Friday 23 November 2012

Revolutionary Tips for a Modern Woman&Relationships where God's Grace is the Universal glue.



'She was standing at the street lights, ready to cross the road, making sure her hair still looked lustrous and pleasing. The dress colour today was black: jacket, sweater, tights, and boots, what an eye of a stranger could see. No skirt.'  This can be assumed to be a descriptive from a novel. In truth, this was my morning observation of a Modern Woman. I could not help, but noticed that the skirts and even hot pans already not in high fashion. It is amazing how from past centuries a woman's dress had evolve at last: no dress, really. We can never assume that God had used evolution to create this world, too many inconsistencies present, but that is a different topic. While vogue changes back and forth, there are certain things that remain; a Woman's heart is just the same, desperate to be loved, appreciated, needed. So let's talk not only about fashion, but about what really matters.

I was in Psalm 20 for my Devotions, here some of the verses:

May the LORD answer you in the day of trouble!
May he grant you your heart's desire

 and fulfill all your plans!..

 He will answer him from his holy heaven

 with the saving might of his right hand.

 Some trust in chariots and some in horses,

 but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.

 They collapse and fall,

 but we rise and stand upright...


 My observation made me to come up with my own verse:

'Some trust in naked legs, fashion, advise of a friend or a young age,
 A woman displays herself as on a cabaret stage,
Will she be in old age honoured, respected or joyful
Will she leave a legacy for the youthful to follow her?'  

Let me explain what I mean. While I would like to talk about many things that concern women, it must be very generic since everybody's circumstances are very unique and different from each other. But it is a good thing for us women to chat about these issues and get armed the best way they can. I do it by relying on the Lord's guidance and His infinite wisdom, for others, who don't know the Lord yet; it is just plain common sense to start with. What is interesting no matter how hard we women, including Christian one's, try at times to exclude God from our circumstances, it can't be helped, but everything revolves around Him. It is up to us thought to willingly bring Him in or distance ourselves even further.

Now when we live a smaller town, people are, more open about things, they have time to be friendly which is hard to imagine living in a big city. In one single day I've heard both of these stories from strangers.

One of the mothers's told me her war story. She was married to a man with whom they had five children. One day, he packed his bags in front of the four children, while his wife with a bump number five and face full of astonishment had watched him too. Not thinking that explaining was due, he walked out on them to a life of 'freedom and no more responsibility.' Oh yes, they were moving houses at the time. She often mentions how difficult it is for her to manage all these growing children. To her knowledge he has dumped two more women since, not getting their divorce papers yet. Why any Woman would desire such a man? Apparently he could be charm itself. This tells me that while a Woman worries about fashion things (a lady with a new born is willing to drive to another city to get her nails done!), her abilities to access another human are raw and naive. If any of those following women had done a background check on this man, his charm could disappear as a vapour. I'm convinced.

Later on in a day, when I was at the 'Mother & toddler group', one of the grandma's was sharing with me about her daughter. 'Yes, my daughter and her husband knew each other from school. They went through University together. Got married. Had two children and he cheated on her after she had the second baby. When the family broke down, I had both boys all the time. It was dreadful.'

Even though God created Woman ultimately a powerful being with such soft skin, beautiful shape, unmistakable aroma about her, gorgeous hair, sharp brain, she lacks wisdom at times, because it wasn't part of the package. It has to be obtained from the Lord. (I take bee pollen when I can. It is one of the most complete food on the planet, especially beneficial for women. The body doesn't produce it, flowers do.) We only could remember Eve or Sarah to get a visual picture. Both of them had such power over some of the most powerful men, Adam and Abraham who did exactly what these women asked them to. Because of lack of wisdom and patience from the Lord tremendous consequences followed for the rest of humanity. Eve asked Adam to eat from the forbidden fruit, while Sarah asked her husband to lie with their servant girl. So is the actions of a Modern Woman are significant today, whatever she does, whatever she says.

Today a Modern Woman often feels that she has to expose everything she posses to-trap- any- man- who- comes- around- quick scenario. No expectations, no ideals, no character - just claim your own! (Tom Cruise comes to mind. That man is probably is the highest paid actor on the planet earth. He appears so desirable to any woman, but if she knows that he intends on leaving double D&D 'divorced & devastated', is he worth it?) Once a Woman got her man in her grip, she starts complaining: you are not worth anything, you don't know me, you can't possibly understand me, you don't value me, why do you attend a church of Scientology? Often it is rightly true because a Woman does not consult God or time or even their parents when choosing the husband. Jane Austine's 'Pride and Prejudice' comes to mind where Lydia boasts to her sisters: 'If we all went to Brighton, I could of find you each a husband.' And wisely Lizzie replies: 'I don't like your way of getting a husband.' Poor Lydia wasn't even aware that she nearly missed the marriage all together.  

When we bake a cake, it is best to use the recipe. The problem I had, I wanted to invent a healthier version. So I thought if I put a lot of blended pineapple and raspberries, I would be able to enjoy a good cake and antioxidants as the same time. Bingo! I didn't follow a proven recipe, so my cake was flat as a pancake! Naturally I was disappointed and wasted time, money and effort while my family had to go without home made healthy cakes at the time. Oh, my eggs from the farm, or my precious honey, or my raspberries… So frustrating.

So the same is true with the marriage. A Woman wishes to get married. She has to follow a God established recipe using wisdom, relying on God's timing and choice of man. It will never go wrong, but when it appears that something has gone wrong, woman always could go back and remember that it was a God thing and what God does is always perfect. Falling back on the truth could revive not only memory, but dead relationships just as much. Didn't God brought to life Lazarus who was dead for nearly four days? Jesus was their close friend, but even this family could hardly believe. No wonder we often don't believe ourselves it is possible. The reality is success will be guaranteed whether 'she marries or not, when a woman follows the Lord.'

The best way would be 'to cover yourself in every aspect with much heavenly wisdom' in order to make a man have a desire to get to know you, to make an effort, to sweat a bit.  He has to make an effort and if he doesn't, he probably won't make any effort after the marriage. Who ever appreciated a diamond that doesn't cost anything?  Modern girls expose themselves by saying: there is nothing mysterious about me, there is nothing unique, don't look for depth, it wont cost you anything to lure me in your arms, ect. A good advise would be here to declutter her thinking wardrobe by asking yourself: 'Will I seem hard as a diamond to get in this outfit/actions?' Such a response is possible after profound impression of the Holy Spirit upon Woman's heart. Your immediate response could be: 'This way I will never get married. Oh, you will, you will.' To a good- Godly- faithful man! After all God isn't a liar: 'He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?   Romans 8:32. 
Of course, if it is according to His will, but who wants it otherwise? 

Many women today are trying to have a baby from a man they are with, thinking it will somehow glue them together forever. In truth, the only glue that there is in this Universe that binds together, is God's unmerited Grace. Children are not to be experimented with; they need to be in a safe environment with both mum and dad. All most significant people, including women committed terrible mistakes at some point or the other, but God brought them through because they relied on Him in the end. 

All relationships that we have as humans are only successful when 'each person thinks less about himself, more about others for start.' This is impossible without unconditional love of God in our hearts. And even then we must pray daily for refill. If we exclude God, the main ingredient from our cake- baking-marriage-any-relationships-making experience, expect it to go wrong. Family that involves so many people is far more complex structure than a mere cake!

Once Adam and Eve had left the Paradise, they no longer understood and related to each other Perfectly. Just as God intervened with their coverings, He will have to do so to the rest of their lives. Eve didn't not have a faintest idea that she will bear the son, the first ever murderer. They had never experienced death before. Neither did she know how to handle it. The same is true for us. Our life is a mystery, the future is veiled and only God know how to fight Satan off, how to prepare us to enter unknown future and all the bumps in the road ahead. We need his Grace and His presence daily. Just like it was in the Paradise days.  




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